Indulgence

Two Steps in the Water

Kate Bush, from Hounds of Love
Take my shoes off and throw them in the lake
And I'll be two steps in the water

After today, the shoes I'm wearing on my feet will be thrown into the garbage. They've got a great design, comfortable and it breathes, allowing a lot of ease when walking. It really takes care of my feet. Unfortunately, being my favourite pair of rubber shoes, I wore them out quickly, always wearing them where ever I go. Especially when I go out dancing; the wear-and-tear on the shoes I've got on when I dance is unbelievable. I happen to dance like a maniac.

All my shoes are in horrid shape. I can't help it, I'm a walker. I walk everywhere. I walk from Robinson's Galleria to Star Mall all the time. Or from Makati Cinema Square to the Glorietta MRT station. That's a distance that is normal for me. That's about a 15 minute walk, I think. Depends on the day... I've never been a good judge of measurement so I'm not even going to attempt to say how far it is. I'd just be off the mark.

I love walking. Unlike dancing or wall-climbing, walking allows me to think and I don't do anything but think. I'm surrounded by thoughts. Sometimes, I get three or four ideas in my head at the same time and I'm toying around with them simultaneously. It's a different kind of feeling, to be overwhelmed by one's on thoughts. Unlike wall-climbing and dancing where the thoughts disappear and for that moment, everything is clear; walking surrounds me with them and the heaviness is a wonderful feeling.

And with all the thoughts in my head, I walk. I let these things simmer in my head. I let them go and take flight. And my feet keep taking steps forward.

But my poor shoes! In what a horrid state they are in. I have to keep buying new ones. After all, in the birthday book and a lot of my astrological readings says I have to take extra care with my feet. Apparently, a lot of health problems will arise if I don't take care of my feet. That's what the books say, I couldn't make this up myself if I had to. And they are all rather consistent. Strange, huh?

So today I wear my favourite pair of rubber shoes for the last time. My feet comfortably snug in them, slowly breathing. I'm also wearing my favourite pair of pants and a shirt that I like a lot. Yesterday was favourite clothes day or whatever but I haven't gone home yet, sleeping in the office so that I can continue working later in the early morning. And then soon, the impending departure of my shoes.

Throw them in the garbage and I'll be two steps in the trash. We are all dying, the moment we were born, we have begun to die. We are all slowly heading towards the point we will no longer be of use to society. It all depends on what state we leave in, I guess. All used up, worn and broken? Or still looking brand new, hardly used, just admired from behind glass?

You decide. I've already decided what I want for myself. I'll be going like my favourite pair of rubber shoes. Torn, dirty, worn-out and falling apart. There's a dignity for having been used and used well.

That's what I decide.

posted by wanggo @ 5:20 AM