Indulgence

weeding

Liz Phair from Love/Hate (written by Liz Phair)
It's a war all the give and take
It's a war all the love and hate
And nothing's gonna change
And nothing's gonna change

How strange. A friend of mine whom I have not heard from in a long time found my e-mail address while blog hopping. He found this blog and, in turn, found me again. Now we are getting back in touch and I find that so cool. As Tesa had said, I'm weeding and all of a sudden, everyone is showing up and making their presence known. I feel like it's some sort mirror of my whole life and I can make better choices about what I want to get rid of in relation to my past. These people may be popping out from the woodwork and I end up remembering myself before. I feel like I can make a better assessment of myself with a constant reminder of where I was, where I am and where I want to bring myself to.

I'm happy about that. The universe is working with me in that regard.

There's still a lot of work to be done and I'm seeing everything much more clearly now. I had a good talk with my Dad the other night as I was driving him home and he told me encouraging things. He is seeing me grow, once again and he's happy and comfortable with the person I'm becoming. He never used the word proud, I would have stuck to that word like glue but he didn't use it. But I feel that he trusts me to take myself where I need to go and that I won't fuck up this time. That's very important to me.

In regards to weeding, I think I've decided to put Watching-Things-Burn to rest. It's done. It's died a natural death and I think I can let it go. I'd like to thank all the people who commented on that site and who helped me feel like I had something to say about things; that my opinion matters. To everyone who put it in their links; thanks, I am touched that you would not be ashamed to share that link with people.

But I feel that my thoughts are better shared with my experience than to make a blog all about my reviews of other people's work. Right now, I think it's about time I start focusing on my own and getting it out there.

It's time for sweat, blood and tears. I'm not super-charged but I am more than ready. It's just a matter of time now; a matter of time and a matter of blood, sweat and tears.

posted by wanggo @ 10:03 PM