Indulgence

a very blue Sunday

Imago from Akap (written by Aia de Leon)
Sasamahan ka sa tamis (I'll be with you in the sweetness)
Sasamahan ka sa pait (I'll be with you in the bitterness)
Sasamahan ka sa dilim (I'll be with you in the darkness)
Sasamahan ka hanggang langit (I'll be with you until heaven)
* my Tagalog translation may be a little off, forgive me

This Sunday, I found myself just lazing away. Had an amazing shoot last Saturday and then followed by fantastic dinner at Bellini's in Marikina Shoe Expo. I treated my Dad, brother and sister-in-law. We were celebrating my Dad's birthday (which he spent presenting the Best Director for a Music Video in the MTV Pilipinas awards) and at the same time, that's how we spend our time together as a family -- through food and good conversation. Afterwards, I got dropped off so I could make it for a date but then, I was stood up. I didn't even know. I had to text and because there was no reply, I knew I was stood up.

Now that's a punctuation mark if I ever got one. That's one way to end your night with a bang. So I went straight home, took another shower and went to bed.

I woke up and there was just no desire to do anything, really. So my brother and I just watched 3 movies. We watched Pirates of the Caribbean but we never got to finish it since my brother's copy was busted. Damned pirates! Aarr! So we decided to keep to a theme and we watched Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World and then after dinner (surprisingly, we had fish) we watched Deep Blue Sea. Suffice to say, my sea legs got itchy and the desire to be anywhere near the ocean was evident. I played around with fantasies of being in the middle of the ocean -- some sort of videographer for some undersea experiment. It was the only reasonable explanation I would be on the damn thing. I'm not cut out for much else. I'm definitely no scientist. But as a videographer, documenting the process, would make some reasonable explanation as to why I was there.

Silly, I know. But it's these fantasies that keep me alive, really.

I also got to find another old journal. It was my most recent chronicling much of my 2004. Apparently, 2004 was highly punctuated by 3 people (4 to be precise). How sad to have been so in love with people who didn't feel the same way. Love without reciprocation isn't as real. I went through those words and found so much potential there. It was all wasted. It was pretty sad. Got to thinking about certain people again.

*sigh* Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.

Can't believe I got stood up last Saturday night. Some people just have no respect. My schedule is bad enough as it is and I don't get to meet new people because of work. Well, I meet tons of new people all the time because of work but because of the situation, a romantic involvement seems completely inappropriate. And I'm never at my best during those shoots. I wear completely comfortable clothing and I don't usually fix my hair. I get all moody and I'm more focused about my shots than I am of presenting myself in any way other than that of someone who is very busy.

Geez, this is really sad...

posted by wanggo @ 12:33 PM