ondragstart="return false" onselectstart="return false"

Saturday, September 02, 2006

Another Shuffle

As texted to me by my Dad
Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs.

There was another crazy shuffle at work last night but I hope this time, it's the last. There's too much to do and very little time left for new changes. We're all at the brink now and if someone falls over, others will have to catch `em. If you are all at the cliff's edge, hanging by your finger nails and then someone falls, you only have 1 hand with which to catch them with. If you use both, you'll both fall down.

It was a very strange night last night as the shuffling continued and then stopped; we began working on solutions. Then my direct superior began to break down. It was very strange. She's much older than me and she was talking and talking and not making any sense. I wanted to leave because my presence there was no longer needed but at the same time I couldn't because doing so would've made obvious what was not being said: what was happening before me was embarrassing and, in a sad way, completely unnecessary. Her direct superior, who happens to have a streak of sadism and the "know-it-all" syndrome was genuinely trying to help her sort out the mess in her head. The problem was, his approach only managed to fuel the fire of her confusion. She was becoming hostile and emotional. It wasn't a pretty sight.

I wanted to leave but she asked me to be there and hold her hand through this. I had no idea she had fallen. At that moment, I reached out and grabbed her and holding us both at the cliff's edge with the other hand.

It was a very heavy moment. Surprisingly enough, though, much good came from the whole thing. Her direct superior was able to get through to her, finally and let her know that she was just panicking, she was getting over-whelmed, she should just rest. Teary-eyed, she stood up and thanked him. All her efforts were recognized, at the least and her problems have solutions, she just needs to focus and put herself back together.

On the way home, she asked my opinion and I gave it to her. I walked her home, telling her how I felt and in the end, found myself instructing her what to do when she starts feeling over-whelmed again. I started telling her how to deal with her bosses and how best to not have to enter that kind of situation again. I was talking to her as if she were a college student and I was the mentor. The weirdness of the situation dawned on me a few minutes in when I realised she was at least 2 decades older than me.

I gave her a big hug and kissed her and told her that things will be easier, things are going to get better. We won't let her fall, I told her. Life is strange, sometimes. You think you're so tired yet you find the strength in you to be strong for someone else when you need to be. And age really is just a number, not any real form of indication of how mature people can be. Different types of people, all shuffled together and then passed around like playing cards. Sometimes, we keep what we need and replace `em with new stuff, or you feel confident enough to play with the hands you're dealt with and then sometimes, you're folded because it isn't enough to play the game.

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