Indulgence

solitude amongst company

Kate Bush from Sunset (written by Kate Bush)
This is a song of colour

We are sensing in crimson, red and rust
We climb into bed and turn to dust

I was in Batangas for the weekend. I almost didn't make it and yet, I began to work in a rush of activity to try and finish everything I could so that I could leave for Batangas without worry; without fear of being called in. I'm glad I made it.

Unlike my first trip to Batangas with my cousins, this was more a relaxed and a more restful vacation. No snorkeling, no running around, very little zipping action going on, very little swimming. I don't know why. I'm not sure if it's because the weather wasn't cooperating. Maybe the cabanas and shade in La Luz is so comfortable that you would rather just lie down and relax than jump into the water. Maybe it was the immeasurable amount of rum cokes? I think that all of us present had a lot of things to think about. A whole lot of things to think about, for sure. Black clouds were chasing us wherever we went. The roof of the cabana could not keep it out and it hung above us invisible and silent -- forcing us into contemplation, to just staying in one place. Solitude amongst company.

The weather, as I told my friend Anne who was to follow the next day (Sunday) was literally a piss off. The sun would be out and then, in a moment, it would turn overcast, the rains would pour, sending people running for shade and literally, 20 seconds later the sun would be out again. This would happen every 3 hours or so. While it was funny to watch people run back and forth; the sky was a breeding ground for rainbows. Too bad my phone's camera's resolution couldn't handle it -- I couldn't take a picture of one of the longest rainbows I've ever seen. From the horizon line until the sky -- arching the way we draw rainbows as children. It was lovely. Was their gold at the end? Would I have the patience and discipline to search for the end of the rainbow had someone said there was? Do I need to know for certain that there's gold at the end for me to make that journey? I don't think so.


I'm beginning to really love the idea of moving to the seaside. I think little trips like that to the weekend is a fantastic idea. Sometimes, you just need to slip out of your own skin. Shedding out the tired, weary-ness that hangs on you like dirt or like a scar. Just be reborn, when you can't take it anymore. Everyone needs a different way of shouting. Shout out what's inside. And leave your voice there when you return. And let it not fester and dwell in you anymore. Let it go and leave it behind.

posted by wanggo @ 4:40 PM