Indulgence

and then sometimes, it all just works out

Philip K. Dick
Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.

Another great weekend except for that little moment in Sunday when I just fell asleep at 9pm and was blissfully unaware of the world, dead to the universe asleep and then I woke up at 2am and couldn't get back to sleep again. I thought I was going to be able to get back all my lost sleep and be able to fix my body clock, but no, sadly that was not be.

A lot of energy, creative energy was flowing through me all weekend. And why not? I had finished another full-length script in a matter of 2 days. It was the most difficult, most compelling of my works to date. It took me a long while to get down to writing it, a little over-whelmed at the whole idea of it, the concept being something so much bigger than what I was told to tell. It was very detailed, very quiet story-telling but the story, in itself, talked about such big things. I was overwhelmed. I was shocked with that responsibility but I wanted it. It was something I knew I could write and I did. I finally got to start writing last Friday and I was done by Saturday. 2 days, a full-length script! And I was able to get the message across. I was so thrilled by the whole idea I had to go out. The possibilities are endless after such a feat. You feel like the king of the world. I felt it.

I partied all night Saturday, leaving the club with the sun rising. Got home to sleep and wake up early enough to make it to zips practice, though a little late. Learned more moves but they're getting harder and harder as the moves are getting more and more complicated. I'm up for the challenge since I know this is what I want; and what's more, I'm getting more and more comfortable with fire. Paulino, my teacher, got me to spin fire again and, being tired, wasn't able to be as inventive as I was in my first time but I wasn't nervous at all. I could feel a level of control. I love it.

So despite the sleep problem and a very, very frightening experience with sludge and darkness (that's a whole different story for a different entry), I had a great weekend. And today, despite the slew of meetings and thinking hard over work -- things start to go my way. I feel very blessed and very fortunate today. I can feel a heaviness leaving my shoulders and I can really smile again and that's a good thing, I know.

Good news all around me and I can feel very positive about things. I am very grateful. It couldn't have come in a more opportune moment for me.

posted by wanggo @ 11:10 PM