Why I Can't Be Superman
Tori Amos from Your Cloud (written by Tori Amos)Do you think just like that you can divide this
You as yours, Me as mine to before we were Us
There's also another reason why I found myself drenched in tears as I got home after watching Superman Returns last night. I didn't want to talk about it because I might end up spoiling the movie for others. So if you don't want to know certain things about the movie and have plans to watch it, then maybe you should skip this part all together.
And yeah, this get a little dramatic.
In my last entry, I talked about a selfish thing that Superman did. You were probably wondering what the hell I was talking about, right? Well, in my opinion, he disappeared for 5 years to try and find his home planet of Krypton when Astronomers found remnants of it in space. He just left and didn't even say good bye. Then he returns and expects everything to be as they were. He didn't realise that Lois Lane would have a child and would be living in with a good man. It pains him. It drives him insane with guilt and jealousy and regret. That is actually what I liked about the film -- the humanization of Superman. I could finally relate to him as a person.
BUT I did not appreciate him flying to her and trying to get her back on the rooftop of the Daily Planet. I do not appreciate his attempt to win her back, to find out if she'd say it, that she loved him. Taking her in a flight over the city and trying to romance her with the idea of who he is. That was just plain selfish. He cannot leave and expect to come back and erase 5 years of people's lives moving on, going on. That's just plain unfair. Yes, he may have given everything he has to the world -- saving it and making it a safer place to live in. But that's the sacrifice he chose to make. And while the world can be thankful for it, he cannot expect the world to stand up and wait for him when he just goes off to do something for himself. Not if he didn't ask the world to wait.
I ended up crying because I empathized with Lois Lane at that moment. To be in love with someone who is neither there nor away. That person just suddenly ups and leaves without saying good bye and then you are, waiting, wondering and hoping. 5 years past and you move on with your life and you just have to keep moving on and you can't look back because if you do, you will never be able to let go.
And then one day, that person returns and still, that person doesn't tell you what that person wants. I don't blame Lois Lane for expecting/assuming/thinking that Superman was going to ask her back; not that he ever told her that he wanted her too. That is so unfair. Now that she's moved on, found someone good. Maybe Richard (played by James Marsden) can't fly on his own or can lift airplanes and boats or can repel bullets with his body; but he's a good man who really cares for her. He should have very much well left her alone. He made his decision and she made hers and he should've respected both decisions.
I cried because I felt that way. Someone who just left and came back when that person felt like it. There was no care or consideration at all for how I felt. Well, that's what I think. There wasn't even a good bye.
Maybe I am over-dramatizing this or reading in too much into the movie but it struck me on that cord. And yes, maybe later on, I did feel sorry for Superman because he was raised to use his power for the sake of mankind. He was raised and told to take care of people and be a beacon for mankind, to be their guidance to show them that they can be good. In exchange, he gave up a chance to live a normal life. That sucks be he didn't have to choose it. He didn't have to live it and maybe the world will be a darker place without him; but we cannot demand that from him. We can't demand anything from anybody.
His happiness or everybody else's? I wouldn't have the strength to make the selfless choice. So, yeah, I applaud the idea of Superman. I salute the idea of a man who can give up his own happiness for everybody else's. But don't take away someone else's because you didn't get what you want.
We all make our bed and we all have to sleep on it. That's what I believe in.
posted by wanggo @ 4:44 PM
2 Comments:
I loved the first part of your blog when I read it early this morning, and it's great that you made a follow-up to it later today. I loved the points you brought up! When I first saw the film, I felt very conflicted. I loved how it captured the iconic stature of what it meant to be a god on earth, while at the same time, I felt very torn about what he had to give up in the end. We're so used to our heroes winning in whatever they set out to do that the notion of a hero who willingly surrenders the one thing he loves most seems abit unfathomable. But you're right: we're defined not just by our victories but by our sacrifices as well. The ending haunted me in a bitter-sweet way. Imagine, the world entire adores him, and yet he's utterly alone, because it wasn't really the world he wanted to move,(despite it being his mission) He wanted the love of one person, more than anything else. And he had to let her go. Because as tempting as it might be to be a home-wrecker, he knew that it would betray what he stood for. And like you said, he lost his right to her heart when he chose not to say goodbye. Like she said, "What's so hard about saying good-bye?"
'Good-byes' close chapters, end musing, and give people the right to move on to other things. He was wrong in what he did...but he made things right by remembering what makes him great:
being true to what's best for all, especially for Richard and Jason. He chose loneliness over selfishness. The noble (painful) choice.
i love reading your blog and i was waiting for your post about this movie. i loved the movie so much that it has also brought tears to my eyes. i was deeply moved by a great story and how Superman, as you mentioned, was humanized in such a way that he becomes real to all of us. reading your posts about him made me realize even more how truly amazing Superman can be! =)
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