Indulgence

shadows and light

Kate Bush from Nocturne (written by Kate Bush)
We long for just that something more

I took another picture of the sky today as I was rushing to the office to finish up my work. The clouds looks like they are going somewhere. The bright flash of sky makes it look like there is something in the horizon -- something magickal, something special. If I could, I'd walk on those clouds, use it as a road to somewhere hopeful and nice and wonderful.

Right now, I'm dealing with shadows, hoping to find out what's behind the light that makes the form. It's a silly thing to do, stupid, in fact, but what other choice do I have right now. I'm getting hit badly by these pangs of longing. I want things to change so drastically that I'm holding on to things that I cannot grasp. It's all this talk about things getting better. I'm not sure if they are; or I'm scared that I can't make it happen.

I'm tougher than this. I'm scared, I'm frightened and unsure. There are flicker of lights and I dare to come upon them and hope that they are brighter up close. Otherwise, I'll be lead astray again and that's just more time wasted.

I'm smarter than this. I'm wiser than this. I'm tougher than this. I have to keep reminding myself that so that it would come to be. Right now, I'm just very tired.

posted by wanggo @ 8:53 PM